Saturday 13 January 2018

Even Stars Burn: Chapter Six

At AK Fashion House 

Arnav was fuming as he stormed into the building, his jaw clenched and his eyes ready to scorch anyone into silence. The receptionist stood to stop Arnav when he barged his way into the actual office. He turned and gave one of his infamous ASR faces which silenced his former employee, there was both fear and shame in her eyes. He continued and found one of his old office lackees, he cornered him and grabbed him by the collar.
"Where is that snake?" Arnav asked through gritted teeth.
"Kaun sa saap Sir?" The ex-employee asked, half terrified.
"Wohi, A-m-a-n." Arnav said every letter clearly, slowly and painfully.
"A-a-aman Sir woh photoshoot main hai, third floor peh." The ex-employee stuttered. Photoshoot? That meant-. Without delay Arnav darted away from these clowns and went to pursue the only thing that consumed his mind nowadays- Khushi.

Khushi one for modesty at all times was struggling slightly with the scanty cuts of the saree and plunging necklines. If Bhuaji saw her like this she would be locked away with nothing but a copy of Ramayan. But this wasn't about Bhuaji or anyone else, this was about Khushi getting the justice she deserved and if that meant compromising on some of her more traditional morals, so be it. Besides, upon a second cursory glance, it didn't look too horrific. The saree was a black lace which was wrapped very thinly across her torso, the blouse was a satin again in black cut into a deep V-plunge. With hair and makeup Khushi felt less so like the "Village belle" instead a hardness came across her, a cold confidence which closed all her worrisome emotions off. It left her feeling nothing, well nothing except for the need to see Arnav and his family in as much pain as they had caused Khushi and her family.

Khushi stepped out onto the set, there was a wall to floor canvas with white roses studded on it which Khushi assumed was the backdrop. There were a lot of people swarming, again all in black. There was a desk behind the camera equipment with Mac monitors prepped, they were using interns to take test shots, to see lighting and such - Khushi had been on a shoot before and vaguely remembered how these things went. Aman was standing over the Mac monitors, engrossed in giving some for of affirmative feedback, a severity in his brow. He looked up and spotted Khushi, who couldn't help but play with the palla of her saree (a tell-tale sign of her nerves). Aman walked over, there was a prowess in his gait like every move he made just oozed the upmost self-assurance - something that Khushi had lost during her time with the Raizada's. She couldn't help but long to be like that again, an almost jealous feeling lingered inside of her but she hushed it away.
"Ready to kill it?" Aman asked excitedly.
"Nahin, hum kisi ko maar nahin sakte hum kya kehte hai....vegetarian hai." Khushi said suddenly worrying some form of animal slaughter would be included in the shoot, she had seen western magazines on news stands, modelling never made sense to her.

"No, no, I meant, are you ready to go model? Like do the best, kill it!" Aman said and Khushi smiled though she had no idea what he was talking about. "Forget about it." Aman said with a laugh that was warm and infectious, it set Khushi somewhat to ease. Aman looked Khushi over. "Nervous?" He asked, without assumption or stress just curiosity.
"Todha bohut, hum aise kapre. I mean bohut sundhar hai kapre, lekin mere ghar mein ladkiyan aise nahin dekhte." Khushi said while trying to adjust her saree to cover her more.
"Khushi I get it, hum hamesha ladkiyan ko kehte aisa nahin karte, aisa nahin kapre pehente, yeh mat karo, woh mat karo... but why? Its the 21st century for God's sake. Its time women should be free from the male gaze. Yeh sabh kapre ke bharein mein nahin hain. AK designs are here to shake up society, encourage women to do what they want, be who they want and not fear anyone. Its about self-confidence and self-assurance." He seemed so passionate about what he was saying and all of it did make sense. There was a part of Khushi that would always secretly want to wear those more risky and glamorous outfits Heroines wore in the movies. But Umaji and Bhuaji would always tell Khushi that normal girls don't dress like that and Khushi would automatically feel guilty for even harboring such ideas. Suddenly Aman was clicking his fingers in front of her face.
"Kahaan koh gayi aap?" He asked with the warmth of a laugh in his voice.
"Nahin kuch nahin, hum tayaar hai maarne ki liye!" Khushi said with enthusiasm and Aman laughed putting an arm around her.
"You're too much Khushi." He said.

Arnav stormed into the shoot and immediately saw red. It didn't take long for him to spot Khushi amongst the crowd of mediocrity. Arnav also did not fail to note Aman's arm snaked around Khushi's shoulders. Khushi too was smiling and seemed quite happy to melt into his embrace, Arnav then noted the clothes - or lack thereof. Arnav's head pounded and his whole body was tense, he couldn't decide whether to burn the place to the ground first or murder Aman.
"Arnav S-sir. Aap yahann nahin ho sakte-" One of Arnav's old Creatives had attempted to chastise him, Arnav raised his hand to her face, refusing to take his eyes off the site of his wife and this fraud. The ex-employee made a yelp out of fear and soon everyone in the room turned to see Arnav, but Arnav's eyes were fixed on her hazel eyes. Khushi turned and her smile dropped to a look of pure dread. Arnav was surprised she could stand to look him in the eyes after such a deep betrayal. His eyes he was sure were cold, hard and piercing. Her eyes in return were soft and shaken, her jaw was tight and her hands balled. Arnav could feel the conflict within her, her heart wasn't really in this, she didn't want to hurt him; he was sure of that. Then why?
"Aaahhhh Mr. Raizada, this is a closed shoot, I'm afraid you are not welcome here." Aman said breaking away from Khushi, he stood primally infront of her, marking her as under his protection, Arnav knew this well.

"Aman, I'm not here to talk to you, I'm here to talk to my wife. Khushi, come outside." Arnav said, Khushi who was stood anxiously behind Aman made no movements- this confused Arnav. "Khushi, outside." He said again, he then noted the faintest shake of her head. Aman turned and smiled.
"I'm afraid my employee doesn't wish to talk to you. Also, just a friendly tip Mr. Raizada, one businessman to another; you should really leave your personal life at home, it looks tacky to drag up personal issues at my star model's place of work." He said and Arnav flared up at Aman declaring Khushi as his in any sense. He charged for Aman and grabbed him by his collar.
"Don't talk about her! Don't you dare say a word about her from your filthy mouth!" He said while pushing him, in what direction Arnav wasn't sure, in his rage he pushed Aman into lights and equipment until Aman tripped and fell to the floor. Arnav had a fist ready to collide into Aman when a hand grabbed his arm. Arnav turned to see who dared to stop him; again those hazel eyes. She shook her head softly and Arnav lowered his hand. Khushi grasped his shirt sleeve.
"Chalo bahaar baat karte hain." She said and proceeded to drag him outside.

Friday 23 January 2015

Even Stars Burn: Chapter Five

Here it is the much anticipated Chapter 5! So sorry for the delay! I truly cannot apologize enough! Just know I am back and plan to update a lot more and a lot more regularly! Thank you all for your patience, support and kind words! I really appreciate it. Now back to the FF! 

Arnav stayed back at the banquet hall long after the event ended. He wanted to be alone. He'd never been one for drinking but tonight the smooth and bitter sting of whiskey called out to him. He closed his eyes and leaned back in his chair. Behind his closed lids danced images of Khushi, laughing, singing, dancing and being that carefree spirit he loved. A smile crept along his face. Then he saw the other side to Khushi, Khushi after he married her, crying, shouting, staring at him with those large frightened doe eyes begging for him to understand her. He opened his eyes and sat up. He poured himself another drink and downed it in one. Nothing. He felt nothing. Have you ever known a man who ruined his own happiness with his own two hands? Arnav did. He also knew a man that drove the only person who he had truly loved out of his life and why? Because he never truly understood her. That man was Arnav himself. Had he just once spoken to Khushi in the beginning, instead of assuming the worst about her. Then maybe...just maybe this all could have been avoided. Maybe then the night of Akash and Payal's wedding he could have told her he loved her and stood by her against Shyam. Then maybe Di would have been able to understand. What use were maybes? Khushi was gone and Arnav...Arnav was alone.

*the next morning* 

Khushi awoke to the loud piercing melody of her Debaang ringtone. This was one point where she did not appreciate this song. She groggily reached out for her phone.
"Hello?" She mumbled.
"Hello. Am I speaking to Mrs. Khushi Kumari Gupta Singh Raizada?" An unfamiliar voice asked. Khushi frowned at the "Mrs" and "Singh Raizada" but begrudgingly had to agree.
"Ji."
"Hi, I'm calling from AK fashion-house. I hope I'm not disturbing you?" The voice said. AK Fashion house, what was that? Khushi had never heard of it.
"Nahin hum toh-" Khushi was about to admit to being asleep but she realized she was speaking to a complete stranger. "Nahin hum free hai abhi ki liye." She said quickly.
"Good. Our boss would really like to meet with you and discuss a potential business opportunity with yourself. Are you free to come in today for a meeting?" The voice asked. Business opportunity? Khushi wondered what a fashion house would want with her. Maybe they heard about her Dabba service? She could do with the distraction, you know since she and... well yes she could do with the distraction.
"Ji hum aasakte hain." She said more enthusiastically.
"Great let me give you the address." The voice then proceeded to give Khushi the address.
"Tik hai hum jald se jald paunchtein hain. Thank you." She put the phone down and hurriedly readied herself.

*In the Raizada Mansion* 
"BHAI! BHAI!" Akash was shouting, his forehead creased with frownlines. The whole family came out, worried by the commotion.
"Kya hua Akash?" Anjali asked, frightened by her brother's sight.
"Di! Bhai kahan hai?" Akash asked.
"Chotte? Woh uppar apne kamare mein hain. Lekin woh dekhnein ki halaat main nahin hai. Usne bohut sharab lee hain. Kal raath ko, woh tikh se chal bhi nahin payain. Hari Prakash ne usse apne kamre tak chorayein teh. Mujhe lagta hai woh abhi bhi adha nashein mein hoon." Di said, the disapproval clear in her tone and the worry shone through her eyes.
"Honestly Di, I don't care. Bhai will have to get over all this for a day. Once he sees the paper he'll sober up." Akash said angrily as he scrunched the paper in his hands. Akash stormed towards Arnav's room.
"Akash! Par hua kya???" Anjali asked, sturggling to keep up with Akash's long strides.
"Woh kameena humko barbaad kiya, dhoka diya!" Akash shouted. "BHAI!"

*At AK Fashion-House* 

Khushi was out of breath when she reached the building. The rickshaw had broken down and she had to walk the rest of the way. She had her hands on her hips and was breathing deeply. It was only when she looked to the side to raise her handbag back to her shoulder away from the crook of her elbow that she took in her sleek surroundings. Everything was monochrome. White walls and static black sofas haphazardly placed around the office. Sharp cornered white desks and everyone wore black. Khushi felt slightly out of place in her fuscia anarkali.
"Ajeeb jaga hai. Kapre behjte hain, lekin jaga hai be-raangi." Khushi mumbled to herself. She was about to go to the receptionist to inform them of her arrival when one of the robots in black came up to her smiling.
"You're Khushi right?" She asked. Khushi nodded. "Fab! Mera naam Malika hai. Hum phone pe baat kiye thi subha mein." Khushi smiled and placed  Malika's voice to her face.
"Ucha! Namaste." Khushi said and Malika smiled.
"Boss ne warn kiya ta khi tum kafi traditional aur formal hai." Malika said, and Khushi immediately unfolded her arms. How did they know that about her? "Aayein hum aapko apne boss se milate hain."

Khushi walked into the office with Malika, this office was pure black, the boss was in his seat, the chair with its back facing Khushi so she couldn't see who this "Boss" was.
"Sir, Khushi is here for your meeting." Malika said.
"Good. Malika aap ja sakti hai. Thank you." Said the Boss. Malika nodded and left. Khushi felt unnerved by these unfamiliar surroundings and the general air of the room. The chair turned and Khushi saw his face. He was fair, had soft brown hair, gentle brown eyes and a razor sharp jaw flecked with stubble. He wore an all black suit and at the sight of Khushi he raised his eyes and smiled. Khushi knew this face...but from where?

*At The Raizada Mansion* 

Arnav was lost in a beautiful dream. Khushi was lying next to him by the poolside at night. Her head in the crook of his arm. She was smiling and looking up at him with the love he had once seen in her eyes. He could feel the even rise and fall of her breathing. He could smell her jasmine scent. She felt so close and so real. But a dream is but a dream and reality...
Arnav woke up drenched in ice cold water and he was gasping worried he was drowning. He opened his eyes and realized slowly that Akash had just tipped this ice cold water on his head. Before Arnav could open his mouth to protest. Akash opened the curtains and the light set off a blinding migraine in Arnav's head.
"Akash please. My head." Arnav said.
"Akash, be gentle, Chotte-" Di was cut off by Akash.
"I'm sorry but bohut ho gaya! Bhai tumhe abhi jaagna hai." Akash said with a tone of severity.
"I am awake Akash. You made damn sure of that." Arnav said.
"No. I mean YOU. NEED. TO. WAKE. UP." He said and threw the morning paper at him. Arnav frowned, unsure of what his brother meant. He read the paper slowly, the words were dancing on the page. He read it again. Then again. One more time. This couldn't be. He scrunched up the paper in his fist until his veins jutted out of his hand.

*At AK Fashion House*

"Please take a seat." The Boss said and Khushi sat down skeptically. Why did he look so familiar to Khushi? Who was this man? What did he want?
"Maaf ki jiye...par aph bohut jaani-peshaani lagte hain. Hum isse pehelein khabi milein hai?" Khushi asked cautiously, glancing over his features again and again trying to work out his identity.
"Sharp. I like that. Shahid apne pehle dhyaan se nahin dekha lekin haan hum dono milein hai. Tumhein shahid yaad nahin kyunki tabh mein sirf ek employee tha aur apka dhyaan kahi aur tha." He said and then it clicked in Khushi's mind.
"Aman?" She asked astonished.
"Aman Khurana at your service." He said with a mini bow. Khushi had met him once briefly when she had first started working at AR. But he had just been Arnav's PA then. How did he build up all this in that time?
"Aapke pass toh bohut saare savaal hongein so let me cut to the chase. I'd been working for you arrogant and egotistical husband for four years of my life. Every step of his advancement had my hand in it. Did I get any recognition or promotion? No. He kept me as a lowly PA because I was good at what I did." Khushi could sense Aman's resentment towards Arnav but couldn't help feel sorry for him. She remembered how hard he worked for him, first in the office and last out. Then when Arnav was angry Aman was always the goat to slaughter. She could understand any bitterness he felt towards him, she most definitely related.
"Hamesha mujhe ek gulam ki tarra rakha. So I started saving up my money, designed this fashion house you are currently sat in. Then I spoke to his employees, I informed them that I was opening up my own Fashion House and that they would be more than welcome to join me. You may or may not have noticed that around 75% of my staff are AR staff who have all over a period of time handed in their notice and come to work for me. All of Arnav's best designers, marketers, event co-coordinators and PR staff now work for me." Khushi was shocked at this. Payal had mentioned that there was a staff shortage at AR and so there was extra work for Arnav to be doing but she hadn't anticipated this.

"Maaf kijiye. ye saabh business vagera mujhse kuch lenha dehna hai nahin. Toh mujhe kyun bhulaya gaya hain? Khushi interrupted.
"Tujshe lenha aur dehna dono hai Khushi." He said and a grin crept up on his face.
"Main kuch samjhi nahin." She said.
"You see Khushi, Arnav understands one thing and one thing only money. Money created that inflated ego, arrogance and pride. Without it he's nothing. AR Fashions is my main rival if I can bring that down I will be the reigning power of the textile and fashion industry here in India." He said and Khushi was still confused.
"Woh sabh toh tik hai lekin woh toh tumhare aur Arnavji khi beech-" She was halted by Aman's sudden movement. He walked over to her, put his hand on either side of her chair and looked at her with an intensity that made her cheeks burn.
"Khushi I need you." He said. Khushi's eyes widened had she heard him right?
"Kya?!" She asked.
"You are undoubtedly Arnav Singh Raizada's greatest weakness. He's arrogant but over you its a whole new level. You're his pride, now imagine how it would look if India's greatest Fashoin House's owner's wife was modelling for a rival company?" Aman said and Khushi was in even more shock. Modelling and her no.
"Aapka dimaak toh tik hai? Main aisa kuch nahin karne wali! She said, she was about to storm off when Aman knelt to the ground.
"Listen to me. Try to understand. I could have just taken his models like I took everyone else but I didn't. Did you ever think why?" He said and Khushi paused out of curiosity. "I wanted the face of my house to be you because you represent everything I have been through to get to here. I knew about the contract marriage, who do you think went to get it drafted?" Aman admitted with guilt on his face and Khushi mirrored humiliation. "I know what you went through and how they treated you. How HE treated you. Khushi don't you want to show them they didn't get to you? That they didn't break you? They insulted you, belittled you, made you hate yourself...don't you want to make them feel some remorse or shame for what they did?" Khushi wasn't sure why, but what Aman said made sense. The Raizada's had baisically gotten away with this without retribution. Khushi had always played it safe, left it to Devi Maiyaan to punish those who were deserving. But when she needed help most, saving most, there was nobody. Anjali lost her husband and so Khushi lost her's too. But when Khushi felt pain, shame and isolation why did Anjali not feel any of this. Aman sparked a dangerous train of thought in Khushi's mind and he knew it.

He stood up and smoothed down his suit. "Maine already announcement ki hai that you are the face of my company. I'm just waiting for your yes. Of course if you want to go back to the world of anonymity and un-importance then I'll say that there was a mistake and have a retraction written. But just look at this before you make your decision." Aman swiveled his mac round and Khushi saw a gossip column on the screen. There was a picture of a drunk Arnav and that model, who was apparently named Kalpana. He had a bottle of whiskey in one hand and her in the other. The article titled, "Tycoon out to play while wife is away." Khushi's blood boiled.
"Hum tayaar hain, apki company ki model banne ki liye." And with that there was no going back for Khushi.

*In The Raizada Mansion* 
"Bhai saaf likha hain. Aman is the one who has been poaching our staff. His company launched today. All our collection plans have been released ahead of our plans under his name. We have no claim on them because he took the designers and it was their work which you hadn't approved yet because of all this family melodrama!" Akash was clearly annoyed. Had Arnav been on the ball none of this would have happened. Arnav noticed Akash failed to comment on the main feature of the article aptly titled "AK Fashion House uses ASR's wife as Face - trouble in paradise?" He was aware that Khushi was jealous because of all the rumors flying around about he and Kalpana but she was actually a good friend and married. She kept it secret for the sake of her career but nothing would ever happen there. But for that to drive her to model for his rival, for such a filthy traitor like Aman, that wasn't his Khushi, it couldn't be his Khushi...he would net let this be his Khushi.
"Akash, Di I need to get ready." Akash nodded, he saw the fire in Arnav's eyes, it was enough to burn the whole world to ash, this assured Akash that Arnav would fix this. Arnav couldn't care less about the company at this moment in time, he could fix that with his eyes closed, he had always been business savvy. But he'd be damned if he lost Khushi to Aman Khurana.

Thursday 22 January 2015

Returning to writing

Hi everyone and by everyone I mean anyone who reads this. Its been well over 2 years since I wrote anything here and yet people still read my writing and fics. For that I am truly thankful from the bottom of my heart. I've had a very tumultuous two years of life, hence my absence from writing. However, now I feel ready to go back to it, that is if anyone still cares to read because my writing only had worth with a wonderful audience such as yourselves. Basically this post is to say I'm back and to also ask if there's anything in particular you guys want writing? I'm aware I left "Agneepath An ASR Story" "The Fated Ones- A Qubool Hai Story" and "Even Stars Burn" incomplete, which if any would you like to see more of. If there are any other fandom based stories you would like to see up here let me know the shows and I'll see if I can accommodate. I really appreciate all the love and support I have received from you guys both in the past and now. Thank you and please don't hesitate to let me know about what you would like to see posting!

Jas :)

Sunday 20 January 2013

The Fated Ones: Chapter One

Asad and Zoya were sat on the steps, the song had faded out long ago and a short while before Yash and Aarti too had left for their room. Zoya couldn't look at Asad, the way he'd been looking at her, could it be...no, Asad Ahmed Khan had no room for such silly things as love. The man who couldn't take a sip of coffee from a mug with the slightest stain, how could that man take the leap of faith needed to love? Impossible. Zoya kept trying to assure herself of this. But the truth was, he had risked his life to save her and he was still doing so. Why?
"Allah miyah, what's wrong with me?" Zoya muttered to herself quietly.
"Apne kuch kaha?" Asad said and Zoya turned to him surprised he'd heard.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. Woh baas, woh haat ki choht dukhri thi, issiliye..." Zoya said and Asad tensed. It was his fault she was hurt, he always did things with the best intentions, but whenever Zoya was involved everything always ended up going wrong. Even by the simple act of sitting down, he was now responsible for the cut in her wrist. He sighed heavily.
"Chalo." Asad said as he bobbed his head left.
"Kaha?" Zoya asked.
"Kamre main." He said and Zoya froze. "Khabraon maat, shahid undaar first aid kit hai, tumhari woh, choht ki liye." He said, Zoya nodded, Asad rose slowly and gave Zoya time to stand too.


When in the room Asad found a box and walked towards the bed he sat down and looked at Zoya who was still standing despite the hand-cuffs pulling on her skin.
"Zoya, zakhm aur gehra ho jayega, betjao." He said and Zoya had this look in her eyes, Asad had only seen it a few times before, for instance when she'd seen a cockroach, it was fear in her eyes. She'd never feared Asad before, not when he shouted, not when he forbid and not when he lectured...so why now? Zoya sat down. Asad opened the box and removed some TCP to disinfect the cut, just in case. He ripped up some cotton wool and began to pour the substance.
"Kya baat hai, usually tumhe chup nahin kar sakta, kohi shayari nahin aari aaj raat? Ek dum khamoshi, its not like you Ms. Faqrooqi." He said, Asad was hoping that he could distract Zoya's attention away from the fact he was about to apply a disinfectant that would sting her and knowing Zoya, she would Hai Tobha this whole Dhabba down!
"Allah Miyah, what's wrong with you? Usually you like women to sit quietly and say nothing, aap kya kehte hai usse, haan, tameez. You know Mr. Khan, apki problem kya hai, aapko yehi lagta hai ki zindagi bas ek hi tarike se jeesakti, aapki tarike se. Lekin aaj jab main chup chap yahaan pe bethi hoon, apko phir bhi problem hai, I mean apka problem kya- OW!" Zoya said and began to pull away, when she realised Asad's hand simply pulled along with her.
"Yeh tumne kya kiya, Mr. Khan?!" Zoya shouted.

"Dheere se bhol, varna voh saab gunde yahan ayenge, aur mujhe haatkhadi meh larne itne uchi se aathi nahin hai. Chup chap behti rahon. Let me." Asad said as Zoya shielded her wrist from him. "Bacho ki tarha maat beshakaro. Kya kheri thi uss raat, ki tum bhade bahadur ho, toh dikha apne bahaduri, do mujhe tumhara haat." Asad said and as he said it he realised the other meaning to what he'd said and he knew Zoya had thought the same from the slightly shocked expression she had. Asad bowed his head slightly, he wished he was more careful with his words, what was he saying? It had been a long day, he was tired, that was it.
He placed the plaster on her wrist and looked up at her.
"Abh kaisa hai?" He asked.
"Tik hi hoga, khabriye maat Mr. Khan, mamooli kharojh hai, tik hojayage. Ishi baat peh ek shair sunati ho-" Zoya was silenced by Asad's sudden closeness. He leaned over, raised his hand and gently placed his index finger on her lip.
"Tum chup hi zyada uchi lagti ho." He said, he'd meant it light heartedly but suddenly he could sense an undertone to this evening. This night had the same air as that moment he had with Zoya after he'd saved her from Akram. He remembered the moment well, it was the first time Zoya, in her frail vulnerability had called him Asad and she had taken his hand. In that moment, Asad had little to no control over himself and he could feel that same overwhelming feeling in the air tonight.

Zoya could hardly even control her thoughts, her brain had launched into over-drive. This was Asad Ahmed Khan a.k.a Jahan Pana a.k.a the biggest problem she'd faced since coming to Bhopal. He never gave her a chance but maybe now he was. There wasn't a trace of cruelty or malice in his eyes, only confusion and maybe even longing. Zoya knew how lonely Asad was but she had recently put that down to the fact that Ayaan and Asad could not interact openly. That was part of it but Zoya felt that there was something else also. There was something in his eyes that pulled her forward, despite his stiff stance and his harsh jaw his eyes were pure and innocent. She was slightly lost in them.
"Asad-" Zoya didn't have a chance to finish her sentence they both heard the gunshots.
"Zoya chaal." Asad said as he helped her stand. They heard voices and they were looming, closer and closer. "Zoya bhaag!" Asad urged.

Even Stars Burn: Chapter Four (Long overdue I know)

Hi all, I'm sorry I haven't updated in so long. I have my personal reasons why I didn't update, I had an overload of work and felt any update wouldn't be to my usual standard and I didn't want to dissapoint everyone. I am sorry for that and hope you will continue to support and read my work. Thanks for your patience, now....let's get back to the FF :) 


Khushi chewed on the inside of her mouth, her hand was itching to grab the pallu of her saree and whirl it around in her hands. But she knew he'd identify that action and realise she was upset and she didn't want him to have that satisfaction. If she had the batter and the fryer she could make a mountain out of jalebis and throw them over Arnav's head. The way he shamelessly surrounded himself with those half-naked models. Did he not feel any remorse, did he really have no respect for her? The grin he gave her answered her questions.
"Chee." Khushi said.
"Apne kuch kaha Bhabi?" Akash asked, Khushi looked up smiled and shook her head. What could be wrong except the fact that she was married to a pig?
"Main abhi aayi." She said and she excused herself. She saw there was a garden area, she walked through the french doors and as she did so she wiped a tear away. The cool air hit her and she breathed it in gladly. She needed it. She felt a-light with rage and pain. She had left him. But that didn't mean she didn't love him. The fact she did made her hate herself. How could she love such a thing? To love something that will never love you with the respect and intensity you deserve, well its a shame on love. Maybe it wasn't love at all.
"Yahaan akeli khari kya kharri hai?" An all too familiar voice said. She refused to turn, seeing his face would tip Khushi over the edge at this point in time.
"Dekhiya, mujhe kohi tamaasha nahin chahiye. Main baas. Abhi nikhalrahi thi, mujhe ghar jaana hai. Aur waisa bhi, tum yahaan kyun ayein, apni kohi time-pass ki saath waqt guzaariye na? Humara haal kyun poochre ho?" She asked, venom spewing from her voice, to mask the pain she felt cripple her heart.
"Oh come on Khushi, biwi ho tum meri. Aapka haal nahin poochonga toh phir kiska poochonga?" He said, she could hear the smile in his voice and she couldn't help herself. She turned-

And blew Arnav's breath away, even with rage in her eyes she was a vision in red.
"Dekhiye, tum humara paati ho toh phir kuch hi dinno ki liye. Uske baad tum aur main, hum dono iss choote rishte se azaad. Lekin! Tab tak, tab tak Mr. Raizada aapko iss rishte ki izzat karna padenga." She said and Arnav rolled his eyes. Really, she'd gone back to that? After all they'd been through? Arnav felt his blood boil.
"Oh really? Jaise tumne kiya? Tell me Khushi how many wives that respect their husbands leave their home to live with their parents? Bolo, abh chup kyun hai, come on, bolo na, tell me DAMMIT!" He said as he grabbed her wrists and shook her. Those doe like eyes looked up at him and he instantly regretted it.
"Main shuru main sahi thi." Khushi said.
"What?" Arnav asked baffled.
"Aap pyaar kar hi nahin sakte, aap pyaar ki kaabil hi nahin, tum toh sirf aukaad dikhana aur haq jaatana aata hai. Aggar tum such main mujhe pyaar karte, toh aap-" The tears streamed down Khushi's face, Arnav raised a hand to wipe him, the apology ready on his lips.
"Chodiye, tumhe bataana main kya faida? Tumne mujhe khabi samja, meri nazaariya se khabi dekha? Agar dekha hota toh tum khabi mujhe shaadi hi nahin khi hothi!" Khushi said with a cold laugh.
"What does that mean?" He asked.
"It means Mr. Raizada, aggar ek bhar, tumne mujhe khabi bhi samja, you would have never thought I would have an affair and with your brother-in-law of all people. But you thought that and for your sister you married me. Tumne mujhe galaat teheraiya, aur khabi mujhse saach bolne ka mauka hi nahin diya. You want respect?  You don't get respect by demanding it, your actions should make people respect you. Lekin afsaus ki baat hai, itna bade aadmi hokhe tumhari soch bilkul choti hai. Mera pyaar toh dhur baat hai, aur meri chaapal bhi tumhari izaat nahin karti." She said and before he had a chance to even defend himself she ran away. Arnav began to run after her but as he ran inside, he was dragged to his seat as his fashion show had began. Where once at a fashion show their love story began, could it be possible that today, here, when Arnav loved Khushi, their love story would end?


Khushi made it home, just about. She locked her doors and collapsed onto her bed and cried all those tears she had held back and let out the pain she'd been holding in. How could he be so cruel? Khushi could see the bruises on her wrists and was haunted by Arnav Singh Raizada the monster. When she'd fallen in love with Arnav Singh Raizada the man. Was it possible that she'd made him up? In love she'd been blinded and only now she could see his reality? Maybe this divorce was for the best....

Saturday 13 October 2012

Even Stars Burn: Chapter Three

Khushi paced around her room, waiting, thinking, trying not to go insane. She wished so badly that Arnav had not visited her that night because since he had, he was all that plagued her thoughts. It had been a week since his visit and yet she could still feel her heartbeat pick up whenever she thought of him. He'd come with huge proclamations and promises but what had happened? Nothing, he did not call, he did not visit, he didn't even seem to care whether she was alive or dead...it pained Khushi more than she wished to admit. Why? Why was it that if she was here in turmoil and pain that he could so easily go on with his life? Why was it that he could make her life into nothing less than a living hell and he could go on leading his privileged life? Khushi was working herself into a state. Payal would come to visit her regularly and although Khushi didn't ask she always informed her about Arnav. Apparently he was very busy with meetings and models, he was burying himself in work...more like distracting himself with women. Khushi couldn't believe that at one time she had actually love-...it didn't matter any more though did it? Her eyes stung as unwanted tears began to stream down her cheek. She quickly wiped them away. This was not a time to feel sorry for herself, this is what she wanted. She wanted him to give up. To let her be....but was she really not worth fighting for? Was everything they had not worth it? To give up so easily....it made Khushi second-guess whether what they had was real or not? Was she just another name on a list? She had thought she was more than that....

Arnav was in the office, pretending to work...truthfully he didn't have the concentration or the energy for any of this but he needed the façade to evoke something from Khushi. He knew that if he smothered her in attention, flattery and gifts she would only accuse him of flaunting his money. So he decided instead to deprive her, starve her of love. It was what she was doing to him, he would not bend to her immature whims, if she cared, she would come to him. He knew she wouldn't come back to the Raizada home, but she'd find a way of getting to him.

Khushi was busy re-arranging her bedroom for the hundredth time, anything to keep herself busy, anything to stop herself from thinking about him. That's when her eyes fell on today's paper. Her eyes widened and her mouth was wide open, she lifted it, digested the knowledge and then tore up the paper. She barged into her room, opened the wardrobe and found a red lace saree, she'd bought it when she and Arnav were together and she'd been saving it for a special time, an anniversary, birthday or just a special time shared together. Instead she would use it tonight.

There was a slight chill in the breeze tonight, Arnav decided to keep his suit jacket on as he walked towards the hotel. He walked into the banquet hall and began to talk to dignitaries and established business men such as himself, when his eyes caught sight of something. At first he thought it was his mind playing tricks, the sleep deprivation had finally got to him. But he was wrong, he knew that face, he knew those eyes, he knew that girl.
"Khushi." The word escaped his lips without his intention to do so. Her hair was out, her eyes smoky and her saree hung from her petite frame in a way that only Arnav felt he could and should appreciate fully. Arnav couldn't believe it had worked, he had made sure that in all the papers it clearly stated that he was holding an exclusive party to show off the "AR Fall Line" however he never anticipated that she would actually come...hoped yes, but the fact that she was here...

Khushi was walking around the room, smiling, laughing and talking to anyone that would engage with her. She had managed to swindle an invitation from Payal on the pretence that she meant to make up with Arnav tonight, but she had no intention of doing so. She had spotted Arnav from the corner of her eyes and regretted coming here immediately  She'd forgotten the effect he had on her, her heartbeat picked up, her thoughts began to jumble around in her mind, she felt all those feelings flood back to her which she had intended to bury deep within. She was fully aware that their contract marriage was due to expire soon but while they were still married there was no way she would allow him to be unfaithful to her, he owed her that much. In the papers they insinuated that there was a model whom he had a special interest in and Khushi was here to put a stop to that, that was all. She had no interest in his deep brown eyes, or that coy look he would give her when they would talk about romantic things and she didn't care that he looked especially dashing today in his crisp black suit. No, Khushi was just here to ensure that he did not further insult the joke of a marriage between the two of them.

Arnav couldn't believe that she had fallen for the bait, really, was she so sceptical and insecure of their love that she truly believed he could so easily replace her. Khushi really was pagal if she believed that? Well, let the games begin...

I'm so sorry

My sincerest and most genuine apologies to all of you. I am very aware that I have recentley neglected my blog and been seriously unfair to all of you guys my great readers. But my life has been super hectic, I've just started working and I work 9-5 Monday-Friday, which is exhausting. However now I am more adjusted to this I think I can go back to updating. I just wanted to say sorry to you all for this. It isn't fair and I feel awful for it! So expect updates soon :)

Jas